宜人董氏，翠堂处士讳琦之第三女也，居同邑。初，处士为择对，于母族以余可妻。妻之自归吾门，事吾母甚谨，每先意承，志有所需，虽资装所有不敢私。余读书夜分，宜人即退处别室，尽妇职不自暇。余忝进士第，费有不给，悉赖其办集。后宦游四方，禄不及养，宜人亦多留于家，自以崇师教子为己事。且谓妯娌团栾，自有足乐，间勉之随，亦无侈心。同官通家簪珥不易常，虽珠玉在侧晃耀夺目，不以经意服饰，惟紬绡不喜华采，或以精幣为礼，又能赞余为之辞。一日，有门媪以外事告，语之曰，此非汝当言，亦非我当听，立叱出之不以闻。故余得以廉勤莅职，亦宜人之助也。晨起当礼观音，遇八持斋素，岁时祀先，必亲涤器。亲戚馈问，必务厚往。使令有过，宁恕不深责。逋负不偿，宁弃不复问。男婚女嫁，皆宜人一手毕事。晚年谓可小佚，不意祸患频仍。壬戌(1262 年)春，哭仲子崐；乙丑(1265 年)夏，哭季子峋；越明年，宜人积忧不已，常避人制衾穟，意若知死者，既而苦寒，痞为庸医误下之。余自京谒告亟归，及境讣至，呜呼痛哉！余既失良助，已无欲仕意。畏此，简书改服，从朝政后六年，始克治葬于善政乡白竹之原，姑纪大概以瘗诸圹。初，以余官至升朝，封孺人，后两该禋典，累赠宜人。生于开禧甲子(1204 年)九月五日，卒于咸淳丙寅(1266 年)七月十九日，葬以辛未(1271 年)十二月六日。子三人：嵘，奏补将仕郎；余二人先卒。女一人，适陈素老，今亦亡矣。孙男五人、女一人。
夫朝请大夫吕秉南志。
石桂孙刊
注：志石高 83.8 厘米，宽 56.5 厘米，厚 8.2 厘米，镜岭镇西坑青石。现存小将镇埠头村。
Epitaph of Lady Dong, Composed by Her Husband Lü Bingnan
Third daughter of Dong Qi, Recluse of Cui Hall of our county, Lady Dong entered my household through maternal kin selection, in which the Recluse decided that I, among all in his mother’s clan, would be appropriate to be his son-in-law. Ever since she became my wife, Lady Dong had served my mother with preemptive care, surrendering even her personal assets for familial needs. When I studied past midnight, she would withdraw. She fulfilled wifely duties without complaint.
Her resourcefulness sustained my jinshi pursuits; her steadfastness anchored our home during my official travels. While I struggled to provide, she oversaw tutors for our sons and upheld sisterhood with in-laws as her true joy. Unmoved by officials' wives bedecked in jewels, she wore plain clothes and persuaded me to decline lavish gifts.
One day, when a maid came to gossip to her, she rebuked, "This is not what you should talk about, nor is it what I should hear!" And she drove the servant out , safeguarding my integrity in service. Her rituals were precise: offering morning devotions to Avalokitesvara, observing the Buddhist vegetarian diet on the eighth days, and cleaning sacrificial utensils herself. She was generous to kin, magnanimous to servants, and forgiving to debtors. She single-handedly arranged every child's marriage.
In her later years, just when respite seemed possible, calamities struck: our second son Kun died in the spring of 1262, and our youngest son Xun deceased in the summer of 1265. Grief-stricken, Lady Dong secretly made her own burial quilts as if foreseeing death. Not long after that, in the bitter winter of 1266, she was down with illness and was misdiagnosed by quack doctors. I asked for a leave and rushed from the capital, but only to receive the grievous news on coming to the county. Alas!
With my essential support gone, officialdom lost meaning. After six reluctant years in court, I buried her on the White Bamboo Plain, Shanzheng Township, with this broad outline of her life to go into the tomb. Initially honored as ruren for my rank, she was elevated to yiren through state ceremonies.
Birth: 5th day, 9th month, 1204
Death: 19th day, 7th month, 1266
Burial: 6th day, 12th month, 1271
Children:
Three sons: Rong, appointed Gentleman for Office Entry; the other two deceased
Daughter: Married Chen Sulao and deceased;
Grandchildren: Five boys, one girl.
Composed by Lü Bingnan, Grand Master for Court Audience. Engraved by Shi Guisun.
Stele: 83.8×56.5×8.2 cm, blue stone from Xikeng Quarry, Jingling. Preserved in Butou Village, Xiaojiang.